What does a depressed narcissist look like?

They do get really depressed- usually when their life is imploding- when they’re failing at something that they are trying so hard to be successful at- like a business endeavor, or if they go through a bankruptcy - when they’re struggling for money. They transition between extreme anxiety and painful depression. These are the moments they come closest to seeing their true self - these are the moments when they can’t convince themselves of their superiority and they crumble. They get suicidal and angry - mood swings are off the charts as they desperately try to salvage their illusion and keep their mask intact. They have no energy at all and they wallow in self pity. This is when they are the most dangerous as they need a scapegoat to blame their failures on. The torture of their main supply is endless as they actually convince themselves that it’s their fault they’re failing but at the same time, they don’t want to lose you yet as they need you. This is also when they’re capable of the worst betrayals as they’re drowning and desperate to change it. They aren’t capable of the same charm and brilliance at this time so they struggle to get the ““high grade” supply that could help pull them out of the hell they're experiencing - this is when they lower their standards to ““get them by” - they’re like druggies feening for a high- seeking validation anywhere they can get it to pull them out of the depths of despair. They torture the main supply to give them strength enough to seek out other sources and when they find someone who is giving them good positive supply - they finish the main supply off by projecting all the bad feelings and failures onto them - they blame them for everything - and BEGIN AGAIN with that someone new - convincing themselves that they would never had failed if it weren’t for that toxic situation they were in- they picked the wrong person is all and they walk away feeling cleansed - the grandiosity back in full force.

They will throw you into the fire to save themselves EVERY SINGLE TIME!